Mmm… Shoes… *drools*

Ah, shoes. Everyone needs them, right?

Who loves shoes?

Dani love shoes.

Is it true?

Mhmmm.

I do, I do, I do-ooo!

Self: That’s Kel’s line about orange soda!

Self: So what!! It applies to me too.

Right. Shoes. I stan for shoes.

Specifically, Louboutins.

Really.

It’s just something about the red sole that just draws me in. And the designs. Plus, they’re actually comfortable.

AAANNNDDD… my Louboutins don’t cost me 3 car notes either!!!

Yay for catching sales and not paying full retail!!

When I find that perfect pair, in this case, the Gazolinas, [I’m not about to drop $2K on shoes until I get my career going. Pfft.]

and I see another heifer about to grab them

Oh, it’s on. Someone’s about to get molly-whopped.

Don’t do it, heifer, if you know what’s good for you.

This past June, I was in Chicago for my cousin’s wedding. How in the hell do you invite 500 people that truly R.S.V.P’d and 1,000 showed up to the reception. Damn my extended family members! But that’s another post for another day.

I was walking down the street with my gram gram [grandma for you slow people];

I’m feeling good and looking good in my divafied hair, with the wind blowing it every which way.

Check out twinkeez2003 on youtube

[twinkeez2003 @ youtube]

These creepy, old, yuck-mouth disgusting guys are looking at me like they want to do some things to me.

Yuck.

But there’s always a silver lining. This delectable shade of caramel hotness was looking too. [Not Justin Bieber, you perv. I don’t mess with jail bait.]

And of course, I stepped up my walking game, because this guy was foine.

Then the worst possible thing imaginable happened.

I tripped on a broken sidewalk. I tried to play it off.

But I failed. Hard.

It’s bad enough that I’m a klutz sometimes. But to trip in front of a ridiculously hot guy too. Oh my goodness.

He’s looking like

And I’m feeling like

At least he didn’t laugh while he helped me up.

Self:  Dominic was hot! Le sigh.

So. Shoes. Who needs them. Pfft.

Daily Dose of Vital Information:

If you’re out dancing, and you think you’re doing this,

But in actuality, you’re doing this,

or this

and you’re wondering why people are looking at you like this

or this

You need to sit yo butt down

or go hide in shame.

Thank you. Have a wonderful time.

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